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    Mateo’s Perspective

    My son Mateo is on the radio! His short 2-minute essay, Meeting My Birth Mother, aired today on KQED-FM Perspectives.

    Mateo wrote the piece as an assignment for his Language and Composition class. His teacher, Mr. Hettleman, submitted the Perspectives of several students to KQED and Mateo’s was one of two that were chosen. Thank you to Mr. Hettleman and all Mateo’s teachers for encouraging our son.

    Here are the first two paragraphs of Mateo’s Perspective. You can listen to it here.

    Hand-in-hand my mom and I walk along the colorful cobblestone streets of Antigua, Guatemala. I am 7 years old and we are on our way to meet my mother— the mother I haven’t seen in almost seven years. As church bells chime, we hurry towards the bus terminal.

    My mom— my adoptive American mom— hired a searcher to find my Guatemalan birth mother. Today is the day I meet her.

    Mateo’s Perspective Read More »

    Textile project

    It’s no secret I love textiles from Guatemala and over the past 20 years I’ve collected a few. I collect from passion—patterns or colors that catch my eye—and while nothing I own is particularly historic or valuable, each piece carries a story—where in the country it was made, the meaning of the design.

    Mostly I buy at the market in whatever place I happen to be, but often I end up with something because the artisan approached me directly with a piece in hand or I’ve watched them at work and bought fresh from the loom.

    On rare and special occasions, I’ll be invited into someone’s home—a woman will walk up and say simply, Follow me, and the next thing I know, I’m standing in her kitchen or sitting in a chair beside her bed, and after we chat and visit, she opens a cabinet to reveal her hand-crafted treasures.

    Although I’ve been great at buying textiles, I’ve been less good at organizing them. After returning to California from a trip, my habit usually has been to open the door to a closet downstairs and toss my latest acquisition on top of the pile, without any order or reason except to keep the piece safe from direct sunlight and moisture.

    This fall before it started to rain, I resolved to tackle the chaos. I pulled out my textiles, grouped them into categories—huipiles, cortes, belts, rugs, bags, aprons, pillow and table covers—and laid them on a table outside on our deck so they could air. After, I photographed the objects, folded and stacked them into bins, and recorded the contents into a file on my laptop.

    Now when I open the closet downstairs, instead of bracing myself for an avalanche, I survey my project with satisfaction.

    I feel happy.

    Textile project Read More »

    20 years

    My first marriage in my 20s lasted five minutes and ended when my then husband left me for his coworker. Soon after, I went through early menopause which meant my body stopped producing eggs and I’d never be able to create a baby.

    Over the next 14 years, I moved from NYC to California and worked at five different jobs. My handful of relationships never panned out. Although none of my beaux revealed exactly why, I had my theories. I was too much of everything: too dramatic, too sensitive, too crazy intense.  

    I manifested Tim before manifesting was a thing. Back then, we called it envisioning. I envisioned a man who was kind and funny and smart. Smart enough not to be scared off by a woman too dramatic, sensitive, and crazy intense. A woman who couldn’t have children and wanted to adopt.

    Today Tim and I celebrate 20 years of marriage. And I’ll tell you, despite my carefully curated online persona, over the past 20 years–like everyone–we’ve faced our challenges, as a couple and a family. If Tim is my rock, I may be his tidal wave. Yet somehow, we balance each other. We hold on and never let go.

    Happy anniversary to the love of my life, my soul mate. Here’s to another 20!

    20 years Read More »

    California Staycation

    Inside SFMOMA

    This is only the second year we’ve stayed home over the Christmas holidays. In the past, we always drove 10 hours to San Diego to visit my parents and family. It’s nice. We like it. Tim and I take long walks with our dog, Charlie, while the kids get to hang out with friends.

    We’ve made a few day trips. One to SFMOMA, where I used to work, to see the Joan Mitchell exhibition. And the other to Monterey Bay Aquarium. A little too crowded for me in these days of Covid, but outside was nice.

    California Staycation Read More »

    Christmas 2021

    Another small and beautiful Christmas, celebrated with our “pod”–the four of us and Patrice, joined by Susan and her family. Christmas Eve at Susan’s house, Christmas Day at ours.

    We wore hats. We ate food. We told stories and ate more food. On to 2022!

    Christmas Eve

    Christmas Day

    Christmas 2021 Read More »