Essay in Grown and Flown
“Grown and Flown” published my essay, “We Found Our Children’s Birth Mothers” back in November, but so much was going on then, I think I forgot to post the link. The piece explores the evolution of my thinking on the subject of reunion. The first few paragraphs: “When we began the process to adopt my daughter Olivia from Guatemala in 2002, we never considered open adoption. Why would we? No one mentioned it–not our agency, not our social worker, not our in-country facilitator. I hadn’t known it was possible. Over the course of my life, I’d been close with people who are adopted—including two cousins—and not one had met their birth families. I’d never heard the subject discussed. “Then, during Olivia’s adoption, which went on for nearly two years, I quit my job in San Francisco and moved to Antigua, Guatemala to expedite the process. We lived together in a small rental house, and sometimes I’d stare at my beautiful daughter and silently question, “Who made you? What’s her story? Does she know where you are?” “Occasionally, at the market or on the street, at a restaurant or church, I’d see a woman who closely resembled Olivia, and I’d be seized by a mixture of curiosity, fear, and elation as I wondered, ‘Are you my daughter’s mother?‘” You can read the entire essay here. As always, thanks for your interest! xoxo
Back to school
Today would have been the day my kids returned to their public high school with a hybrid model, but our county is in purple, so we’re back to 100% online. What that *often* looks like in this house is class in bed, wearing clothes that were slept in, with much meandering to the kitchen when cameras are off. But you know what? Olivia and Mateo have learned a lot. They’ve learned that science is real, that individual actions affect the whole, that the key to pandemic survival and even happiness is adapting to “what is,” which is not always the same as what we want it to be–not by a longshot. We’re crossing our fingers California’s numbers drop and the vaccine roll-out goes smoothly. Meanwhile, we put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward. xoxo
Christmas 2020
No date stamp needed on this year’s holiday card. Season’s Greetings from us to you! xoxo PS: The kids are standing on a fence behind us. They’re tall, but not that tall. Photo taken at Muir Woods.
Happy holidays!
Sunday night we watched the 22nd annual “A Home for the Holidays” on CBS, hosted by Gayle King and produced by the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, and I will tell you, I wasn’t the only one sitting on our sofa, crying. The show tells the story of families created through foster-adoption, and every year when I watch it, I’m overwhelmed with a feeling of absolute gratitude for how adoption has transformed my life and our family, and for being part of what I think of as my tribe, my people, my adoption community. I’ll never stop counting my blessings. Happy holidays from my family to yours! ~ Jessica, Tim, Olivia and Mateo (ages 18 and 16). PS: The kids are standing on a fence post behind us. They’re tall, but not that tall! 😉
Parent Panel with Next Generation Guatemala
I’m a long-time admirer of Next Generation Guatemala (NGG), an organization of young adults born in Guatemala and adopted to the US. Which is why I was thrilled when asked to participate in NGG’s Parent Panel/Q&A, with questions around decisions to adopt, how we connect to Guatemalan culture, how/if we build community, how/if/when our families discuss race. Excellent, fascinating discussion all around. Here’s the YouTube link, with my apologies for joining in late.